Chapter 4: Prime
Someone somewhere has often said that the first step to solving a problem requires outlining all of the possible options.
I would like to say that this is all well and good when you actually have options.
Someone else somewhere else also said that you always have options.
And I would like to say that if I ever meet that person I will ask Ben to take him into the briar patch for a brief and painful lesson in ball retrieval.
Someone else sometime once said that if life serves you lemons you should make lemonade.
I would like to say that if Ben and I had had lemons we would have made lemonade.
We would have made lemon pie.
We would have made lemon cake and lemon strudel.
We would have juggled them for money and used them to set traps for mountain lions who we could then tame and teach them to hunt for us while we rode on their backs wearing lemon loin cloths.
We would have eaten them whole, drank from their sour skin, bathed in their juice, and composed poetry about their aphrodisiacal properties.
But we didn’t have lemons. We didn’t have food. We didn’t have water. We didn’t have a place to sleep. We didn’t have a phone that worked. We didn’t have anything for at least another twenty-five miles in either direction. All we had was seventy pounds of gear that had all of a sudden become quite meaningless and a hunger pang that would have brought Gandhi to his knees.
The universe, it can be seen, is particularly adept at wielding its awesome power to the detriment of its occupants when their hubris has become too great. Upon succumbing to humility, however, the occupants may find solace in the fact that, all things being equal, nothing lasts forever. However, in such moments of strife, forever is a word that only applies to the moment at hand, and an existence outside of the conundrum is infeasible at best.
4 Comments
Comment by Oswald Moseley
April 24, 2006 @ 1:48 am | Link
Another perfectly lovely chapter. In fact I’d say that chapter 3 is the perfect successor to chapter 4. I hope chapter 5 comes next.
I hope you’re not planning to cycle to Alaska. Watch out for the Yeti.
Comment by Damon
April 24, 2006 @ 10:26 am | Link
I suspect if Ben and I come to Alaska with our bicycles it will be to run the Iditarod — of course, we will have to perform some slight modfications to our trusty Cannondales to keep them above the snow, however, I suspect there are so few roads to ride on in Alaska anyhow, we would have to make those modifications regardless of the path chosen.
Comment by Ursula
April 24, 2006 @ 11:34 am | Link
I am, evidently, poorly suited for serialized books. I tend to plow through 1-4 (regular) books per week. This waiting to see “what happens next” is not befitting my nature. Hurry up and write more.
Comment by Damon
April 25, 2006 @ 12:37 am | Link
Well, I am, obviously, poorly suited for writing. I tend to get depressed when it takes me 4,659 hours to write something that can be browsed through in one sitting (clever as it may be). My only suggestion would be: read slower. Perhaps at the same pace it takes me to write it or even slower still. Read one word, and then read that word again, and then share a pensive moment considering the etymology of that word and how it might be best translated into Cantonese.
That’s the best I can offer. Other than my time-travel machine which can take you into the futute but, as of yet, cannot return you in one piece. It’s your choice.
To be honest: I’m so excited people are reading it I may stop writing all together. Especially when I can spend my time composing replies to comments (which is my real passion).
Leave a Comment